


Black Hair

by DupreeWolf



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: A little angst, Brotherhood of Steel (Fallout), Fluff, M/M, Nate was married to a man, Pre-Relationship, not much at all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 12:43:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19296001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DupreeWolf/pseuds/DupreeWolf
Summary: Nate volunteers to cut hair for his fellow Brotherhood soldiers.





	Black Hair

**Author's Note:**

> Just as a preface, Nate was married to a man, Atticus, before the bomb and both of them served as soldiers. They did not have a kid and Nate watched Kellog shoot Atticus and drag him away.

Working as a soldier for the Brotherhood of Steel wasn't always shooting synths and mangling mutants. Everyone has secondary duties, some mandatory such as kitchen duty and scrubbing the latrines but some were optional.

Once a month was hair cutting day. The BoS didn't have their own personal stylist and most soldiers liked the military cut through and through. So a couple of soldiers would volunteer to take a razor to their fellow comrades' heads.

This was actually one of Nate's favorite things to do in the Brotherhood. He liked sitting people down and talking, asking them about themselves. All the while keeping his hands and mind busy.

That’s how he met and befriended a lot of people on the Prydwen. And lot of the initiates told him he was their favorite because the other barbers (usually higher ranking soldiers) were silent and intimidating. This just tickled Nate pink. He was glad to be a source of comfort, especially in a world as messed up as theirs.

It was about two am when all the volunteer barbers were done. Nate waved to them goodnight as he cleaned up his station. He happily ran his hands through his own cut hair as he whistled old pre-war songs.

"Done for the night, soldier?" A friendly voiced called from the doorway.

"Danse!" Nate turned with a smile on his face. It had been a while, three weeks, since he'd seen the Paladin, who had been out on a special solo mission ordered by Elder Maxon. Which was a damn shame because Nate never truly felt in place around the Prydwen without him there. Then a thought occured to him. "Oh did you come here for a haircut?"

"Oh I couldn't possibly bother you with that," Danse said, unsure of himself. "It's nearly 3 o' clock in the morning, you should be heading to bed."

"My sleep hours are always messed up, and this will only take a second. Come on, you're looking pretty shaggy."

"I am?" He touched the top of his slicked back hair and grimaced. It _had_ gotten pretty long since he was gone. It wouldn't hurt to have a little cut. “Well, if you’re sure.”

Danse sat down in Nate's rolling chair, for once out of his power armor. He felt naked.

"First we're gonna need to wash out that stuff in your hair," Nate muttered mostly to himself then swung the chair to the sink nearby. He must have taken a bath recently, Danse thought, because as Nate leaned over him to grab the shampoo he could faintly smell hubflowers.

"Ok, do you want the mutfruit, the abraxo, or hubflower shampoo?"

"Hubflower," Danse answered hesitantly and Nate grabbed it off the shelf.

"Hm, I would've pegged you as the abraxo shampoo type of guy," Nate gave him a grin from above that sent his heart fluttering. "I guess you're just full of surprises."

_I'm not the only one_ , Danse thought to himself as Nate doused his hair.

Getting his hair washed was the closest thing to a religious experience Danse had since first being intiated into the Brotherhood. Nate was so gentle yet thorough. And quietly, so quiet Danse strained to hear it, he was humming some song Danse didn't recognize. He felt so relaxed he feared he would fall asleep. Or maybe it was a lack of sleep on his part, yes that is what he would tell himself, it’s because he didn’t get enough sleep.

"Ok all set!" Nate tilted the chair back up and patted Danse's head down with a small towel. "Man you really let it grow out, huh?"

"Well I wasn't in the luxury of having a hairstylist around on my mission, soldier."

Nate was gathering his scissors and still patting his hair dry when he said, "Oh I hear you. Once had to go a whole half year without getting my hair cut. Had to keep it in a bun so it wouldn't get in my face."

Danse would have liked to see that.

Over him, Nate stilled, which was unusual for him and even more unusual since he was meant to cut his hair.

"You okay, soldier?" Danse turned in his chair to see Nate wiping tears out of his eyes and trying to quiet his sniffling. " _Nate_?"

"Oh god, I'm so sorry," Nate whispered behind his hands.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm just," Nate held back a choked sob, " _stupid_. I'm just being stupid."

"You are not stupid, you're one of the smartest people I know." Danse had seen this kind of thing happen before. Soldiers suddenly crying over nothing. Hell, he'd done it once or twice he was just lucky no one was around.

You don't live in this world for as long as they had without getting some kind of trauma, the kind that sticks with you forever. The kind that pops over little innocent moments.

Danse reluctantly put one arm on Nate's shoulder, unsure and not wanting to cross any boundaries. He just wanted Nate to know he was there for him.

"Can you tell me what's wrong, soldier?"

Nate dropped his hands slightly but still avoided Danse's eyes. He let out a big sigh then said, "My husband had black hair too."

_Oh_ , Danse thought. Though he wasn't really surprised. Most of Nate's sadness always stemmed from one thing, his lost husband.

"Do you want to talk about it? You should, I think it would make you feel better. But you don’t have to, I won’t make you."

"Please, just sit down Danse," Nate pleaded and Danse went to argue but, "I'm just really embarrassed." That was something Danse understood. So he sat back down, hyper aware of everything going on behind him.

Danse waited in silence for quite a while, hearing the occasional sniffle. Then Nate's hands began to shuffle his hair.

"You don't have to do this, Nate, not if it reminds you of bad memories."

"It wasn't ...," Nate said with a soggy voice. "It's not a _bad_ memory. I just miss him."

Danse didn't want to say anything, just wanted Nate to get out all he needed to. He heard the scissors being opened and shut and saw some of his hair float down.

"When we were in Anchorage, a soldier near Atticus set off a landmine. He was hit by some shrapnel but was lucky to be alive. The doctors said he would need a minimum of three weeks to recover and, well, he was never one for sitting still. He drove all the staff crazy trying to escape or overwork himself.” Nate chuckled and Danse chuckled with him.

Danse had felt that restlessness as well before. Luckily he was quick to heal.

“Their one reprieve,” Nate continued, “they told me, was whenever I took him to the showers. I was the only one he allowed to do this. He said everyone else didn't know how to properly shower. All the nurses asked how I could put up with him but he was never awful around me. He was funny, and kind, and just about the only person that ever listened to me."

"He sounds like a good man."

"He was, one of the best I'd ever known." Nate went silent after that, just quietly trimming Danse's hair. "All done! And sorry for unloading all that on you."

"Don't be. That's part of my job."

Nate gave out a chuckle as he brushed the cut hairs from Danse's shoulders. "I don't know any officers that would just let me spill my guts like that."

_I didn't just do it as an officer_ , Danse thought and considered voicing his feelings out loud. "I don't just consider you a soldier, Nate. If you'll excuse me for saying this but," Danse stood and turned around to face Nate, "I also consider you a friend."

Nate smiled, soft and almost timidly. His eyes teared up and Danse worried he said the wrong thing. "I consider you a friend as well, Danse. I'm not sure I would have survived as well as I have, if at all, without you."

"Well, the Brotherhood definitely has a lot of advantages in the-"

"No, Danse, I meant you _personally_. The Brotherhood has helped, but you in particular have ... made me want to stay."

Nate's face was turning red and he was avoiding Danse's eyes again, looking at his hands. There was no question to what he meant by stay, there wasn't any place he could go except one very very permanent place. Danse hadn't realized how much of an effect he had on the other man. He wasn't sure what to say. The silence was heavy and suffocating.

"I'm ... glad you decided to stick around, soldier." Danse's voice just a whisper, finding it hard to break the quiet around them.

"I am too," Nate whispered back.

"Are you...? Feeling better?" Danse asked, unsure of himself.

"Much better, actually. Thank you, Paladin."

" _Outstanding_."

Nate once again was smiling. His eyes were still red around the rims but his smile could outshine the sun and his honey eyes twinkled.

Danse would sit there for a hundred years and listen to Nate's stories if it meant he didn't lose that smile.

 


End file.
